I’ve been on a healing journey for over a decade now, but recently I’ve begun to make some huge breakthroughs, and am now realizing how grateful I am for all these difficult years, because if healing had come so easily to me, then I might never have discovered the magic within me that I’m uncovering now.

Dear Brave Soul,

This is one of my personal journal entries, and as such, I’ve not written it with the intention of an audience. I’ve decided to share some of these reflections with you based on two desires:

1) to remember I am not alone — sharing my raw thoughts and being vulnerable may allow me to connect with others who have similar thoughts/feelings/experiences (aka, I’d love to hear from you!)

2) to remember I am not my ego — I believe we all have a right to share our opinions. However, for much of my life, even still, it’s been difficult for me to express myself out of fear someone will respond negatively. Being vulnerable and opening up with my potentially esoteric, or even controversial, thoughts is me facing that fear, and I understand it may very well cause my ego pain.

To note, these entries are largely unedited, though if I’ve added/clarified anything, you will see a ‘[…]’.

Sincerely,

my Dying Ego

January 29, 2021

Last night, the idea came up again, about how maybe becoming healthy is less to do with the actions you take and more to do with the feelings they give you. So to follow this out a little…

I’ve learned that there are many ways to heal, and we’re all different in what we need. Sometimes people have healed spontaneously from an illness that was considered to be their end. Sometimes people have gone on Ayahuasca retreats, or taken marijuana. Sometimes a person goes to the doctor and has a procedure done or takes a prescription drug. Sometimes a person seeks out an alternative therapy or sees an eastern medicine practitioner. Sometimes a person has even visualized their healing into reality. And people have healed [with] all of these things.

Through realizing there are so many ways to heal, I’ve understood that the underlying factor was that the people believed these things would heal them. And now, I feel I’m understanding it one step further. That the belief in these things gives people a certain feeling. Even though the belief may simply be a subconscious one, there’s still a feeling that is evoked, and [maybe we only perceive it as the feeling of] getting better…. BUUUUT isn’t that the whole phrase?!! I’M FEELING BETTER?!! [What if we need to focus more on emotionally feeling better first, to then physically feel better?]

So belief is super important, but what if the thing I’ve been looking for, the thing that allows us to get at the base power of healing, [what] if the answer is simply feeling? Understanding how to just feel good.

There are so many ways to do this. Whether it’s meditating to practice letting go of negative thoughts and just be. Or practicing gratitude to bring up the good things in life. Or finding awareness in how many negative things we say to ourselves and replacing them with positive thoughts. Or examining our triggers and understanding why something makes us upset, so as we learn we can release our negative feelings. Or becoming aware of our limiting beliefs and replacing them with positive beliefs instead.

All of these things I’ve heard about, and how they are important steps along our spiritual and healing journeys, but I’ve never really understood why until now. Because it’s all of these things that allow our vibrations to increase, and really, it’s almost been obvious all along. Vibrations are connected with states of being, which we experience through feelings. So really, the answer to healing is to do whatever makes you feel better [in the long-term]–whatever will evoke a certain feeling within you.

Author Bio: Hi, I’m Bethany! Over the past 10 years, I’ve been on a winding journey in search of healing. I created Love myHealth as an outlet to share my story and empower others. I’m passionate about all things health, but what intrigues me most, is the healing essence of an empowering mindset. Some of my favorite things in life include acro yoga, walking under the stars, life-changing conversations with strangers, and food (most notably: gluten-free pizza and nice cream.)