Like I promised, I’m gonna be honest.
This week, I had planned to write a blog about how I’ve been finding more empowered moments in my life. And that’s true, and more exciting than I have the energy to currently portray. But right now, I’m not in one of those empowered moments, or at least not the one I wanted to tell you about. I had a rough few days where pieces of what I’d thought I’d left in the past came up.
My victim self played a significant role during this time, but not the only role. I realize a few bad days (or even a lot of them) don’t force you to give up your power, unless you let it. Because empowered moments are available not just during the ‘good’ times, but the ‘bad’ ones too.
For the first time in almost 6 years, I had a binge episode. It was relatively minor in comparison to my past, but regardless, I was out of control. The familiar feeling had come back, where I numbed my intuition, and shoved it away in a closet.
When I surfaced, the victim part of me whined, ‘What in the world happened?! You had been doing so good. What are people going to think? Maybe don’t tell them. Just watch Netflix and try to forget about it. Here’s the rug, it’s the perfect hiding place for all those uncomfortable feelings!’ But then I remembered, this is not the way I speak to myself anymore. The empowered part of me affirmed, ‘This happened, because there’s something you’ve yet to learn. So dive into how it’s making you feel and what there is to learn from that. Give your emotions space, let them speak, and accept what they have to tell you.’
It was one of those days where I learned that even when I’m so horribly nauseous, and scared, and feeling like I want to hide so I can ignore how I’m feeling… none of that requires me to give up my power.
Power doesn’t mean strength in the way most think about it, where it’s about not making mistakes and putting on a strong face. Power actually means the kind of strength where you show you’re not always strong, and you’re not always perfect. And not just that, but you accept it, and learn what it’s there to teach you.
Standing in my power doesn’t require me to be ‘strong’ all the time. In fact, that’s what Brene Brown is always talking about: vulnerability. Being able to show you’re not always ‘strong’ is what makes you truly strong. Being able to admit you have faults and that you’ll always be learning along your entire journey is you embracing your true you, and not the ‘you’ you wish you were, or the ‘you’ you think other people want to see.
“Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weaknesses.” — Brené Brown
Author Bio: Hi, I’m Bethany! Over the past 10 years, I’ve been on a winding journey in search of healing. I created Love myHealth as an outlet to share my story and empower others. I’m passionate about all things health, but what intrigues me most, is the healing essence of an empowering mindset. Some of my favorite things in life include acro yoga, walking under the stars, life-changing conversations with strangers, and food (most notably: gluten-free pizza and nice cream.)